After years of disputes and disagreements my mother told me she is proud of me.
I have not heard her say that since I rejected society’s norms and decided to hit the road in the search for my own independent lifestyle.
She was worried that I won’t be safe or not succeed in life and was trying her best to keep me home and find me a husband.
Society places enormous responsibility at the feet of the mother and is quick to blame her for all of her child’s successes or failures in life.
And growing up in a male defined culture that devalues feminine qualities caused me feelings of inadequacy, confusion and inferiority while trying to fit in.
On a cultural level, the established order is one of deeply entrenched patriarchal values, those of dominance and control by the stronger and more powerful male population.
I felt that in order to find my freedom, independence and individuality I had to reject all feminine qualities that were perceived as inferior – thing like being soft, passive, dependent, vulnerable or seductive.
The restrictive context of gender roles and the deep seated sense of female inferiority made it seem that being a mother would always mean to be imprisoned and give up on your own aspirations or goals.
It took me years to realise that my mother was not to blame for the confusion and low self esteem I was experiencing in a culture that glorifies the masculine.
It never occurred to me at the time I was growing up that her frustration and need to control had its roots in the way society treats women.
I closed off large areas of myself and started to compete for mens’ attention while ignoring everything that gave me pleasure so as not to be seen as weak.
But this way, I didn’t learn how to relax, how to nurture myself or how to enjoy life so I was getting burned out.
I’d been sacrificing my relationship with my mother and my sisters and myself to be heroic in a man’s world. It’s time to get back to what’s really important.
That’s why I started The Goddess Calling, a movement that empowers women to embrace their feminine qualities – and it also helps men to understand, protect and value what a woman’s sensibility can bring into society.
Join the movement now!